Its day Day 29 of ‘I’m not taking NO for an answer’ challenge and I’m bouncing back, (slowly) just as my 30 day challenge draws to a close. I’m not a quiter and like to see things through to the end, so today I want to share with you my top 3 ways for creating resilience, the ability to bounce back with ease.
1. Be your own best friend – you wouldn’t push your best friend so don’t be so hard on yourself. Be proud of who you are and learn to accept your weaknesses as well as your strengths. Spend some time doing things you enjoy, like listening to your favourite music, reading a book or magazine and take good care of yourself, eat well and rest.
2. Be Realistic – anyone who has ever set themselves a goal will be familiar with the acronym SMART and how it relates to goal setting. Learn from your current situation or mistakes and pay attention to your thoughts and feelings, maintain a positive frame of mind and do what seems right for you.
3. Have gratitude - years ago I would have called it ‘writing a diary’ but these days I place my focus on being thankful for my life, I now call it journaling, jotting down a few lines on who and what I am truly grateful for, the people I meet, the events and experiences I encounter, the caring and supportive relationships I have, my friends, family, pets, the weather, the sheets on my bed in fact anything that springs to mind as I make an entry. Giving thanks for those little things is a great way to remind yourself that there is good in just about everything. All things work for the greater good no matter how seemingly difficult things may appear at the time.
Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got ~ Janis Joplin
Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Sunday, 6 June 2010
Being Your Best Self Not A Perfect Self
Day 21
Finish each day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Finish each day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Saturday, 5 June 2010
How Frequently Do You Stop And Smell The Roses
I didn’t manage to post last evening. I arrived home tired but happy after a fun filled day at Epsom Ladies Day with members of my ‘Winning Women’ networking group.
My perception wasn’t of ‘falling off the 30 day challenge wagon’ as my fellow challenger described, to me it was about knowing my limits, my priorities and when it is time to ‘stop and smell the roses’.
I wanted to spend some precious time with my girls before they went off to bed and hear about the adventures of their day, number one priority. Number two was to complete some last minute preparation for my VIP clients day that took place today.
When I was thinking about this I remembered the story below which illustrates the point perfectly.
“A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousands of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.
Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.
A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk.
A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.
The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.
In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.
No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.
Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theatre in Boston and the seats average $100.00 each.
This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?
One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be:
If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?”
My perception wasn’t of ‘falling off the 30 day challenge wagon’ as my fellow challenger described, to me it was about knowing my limits, my priorities and when it is time to ‘stop and smell the roses’.
I wanted to spend some precious time with my girls before they went off to bed and hear about the adventures of their day, number one priority. Number two was to complete some last minute preparation for my VIP clients day that took place today.
When I was thinking about this I remembered the story below which illustrates the point perfectly.
“A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousands of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.
Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.
A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk.
A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.
The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.
In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.
No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.
Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theatre in Boston and the seats average $100.00 each.
This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?
One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be:
If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?”
Thursday, 3 June 2010
Do You See What I See?
We all have blind spots. As my coach says, sometimes we can’t see our own face.
I’m often surprised how I react to others perception of me. Today 3 different people in three different situations told me I was inspirational. I was taken aback.
Three years ago as preparation for a workshop I was attending we were asked to contact a minimum of 10 friends, colleagues or members of our family and ask them to list what they saw as our unique abilities. An exercise that I believe originated from Dan Sullivan.
Dan believes we spend our time moving from one to another of these four areas.
Incompetent
Competent
Excellence
Unique Ability
At the time of the exercise I was surprised by the results, see below. Dan Sullivan says your own unique ability is effortless, It just happens naturally because it’s what you love to do. My biggest learning from the exercise was that I was spending too much time focusing on my weaknesses. If these are my strengths then I need to nurture them. And nurture them I now do, only sometimes more easily than others!
Supportive of others ,Honest , Listens, Calm, Energy/ get up and go /Get on and do/ Go the extra mile ,Hardworking / give 100% ,Empathises with others concerns issues problems , Approachable, family orientated, Passion for business is inspiring, Reliable, Focussed, Determined ,Sincere, Welcoming, Genuine, Courageous , Loving ,Dependable, Good fun , Kind, Consistent/ constant Interested , Valuing others , Let people be themselves/ people relax in my company/ non judgemental Passionate, Trustworthy, Warm, Attention to detail, creatively minded, Super organised, Anticipate what might happen in a situation, Look after self, Sensitive to other peoples personalities, Help people talk through and resolve complex stuff, Active, Involved, Quick to see patterns, Hands on, Pushes self out of comfort zone, Encouraging, Friendly, Sincere, Spiritual, Caring, Helpful, Loyal, Easy to talk to, Guidance, Sees the positive, Helps others identify their strengths, Mentor, Confident,Good sense of humour, Excellent communication, reflective, Professional, Neat, Intelligent, Cheerful, Safe, Curious, Calculated risk taker, Responsible, Efficient, Motivating, Giving, Generous with time, connecter, Challenges others
I’m often surprised how I react to others perception of me. Today 3 different people in three different situations told me I was inspirational. I was taken aback.
Three years ago as preparation for a workshop I was attending we were asked to contact a minimum of 10 friends, colleagues or members of our family and ask them to list what they saw as our unique abilities. An exercise that I believe originated from Dan Sullivan.
Dan believes we spend our time moving from one to another of these four areas.
Incompetent
Competent
Excellence
Unique Ability
At the time of the exercise I was surprised by the results, see below. Dan Sullivan says your own unique ability is effortless, It just happens naturally because it’s what you love to do. My biggest learning from the exercise was that I was spending too much time focusing on my weaknesses. If these are my strengths then I need to nurture them. And nurture them I now do, only sometimes more easily than others!
Supportive of others ,Honest , Listens, Calm, Energy/ get up and go /Get on and do/ Go the extra mile ,Hardworking / give 100% ,Empathises with others concerns issues problems , Approachable, family orientated, Passion for business is inspiring, Reliable, Focussed, Determined ,Sincere, Welcoming, Genuine, Courageous , Loving ,Dependable, Good fun , Kind, Consistent/ constant Interested , Valuing others , Let people be themselves/ people relax in my company/ non judgemental Passionate, Trustworthy, Warm, Attention to detail, creatively minded, Super organised, Anticipate what might happen in a situation, Look after self, Sensitive to other peoples personalities, Help people talk through and resolve complex stuff, Active, Involved, Quick to see patterns, Hands on, Pushes self out of comfort zone, Encouraging, Friendly, Sincere, Spiritual, Caring, Helpful, Loyal, Easy to talk to, Guidance, Sees the positive, Helps others identify their strengths, Mentor, Confident,Good sense of humour, Excellent communication, reflective, Professional, Neat, Intelligent, Cheerful, Safe, Curious, Calculated risk taker, Responsible, Efficient, Motivating, Giving, Generous with time, connecter, Challenges others
Wednesday, 2 June 2010
It's Your Choice
Day 17
“Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.” Said Charles R Swindoll
There is no getting away from it, we all face setbacks, mishaps, challenges and obstacles strategically placed along the road of life. How you deal with them ultimately determines the quality of your life.
This morning I had an appointment for a blood test at my local doctor’s surgery. A place, thankfully I rarely frequent. I was unsure of the procedure, was a few minutes late for my appointment and was spoken to in a very rude manner by the phlebotomist. So much so I was on the verge of tears.
Driving home I was processing the situation and came to the conclusion that it wasn't so much the sarcastic way I was spoken to - but my reaction to what she had said. I had a choice, to feel hurt and angry and let it eat me up all day or I could simply let it go.
How you react to situations is a choice that you make every single day. Next time something similar happens to you, remember you choose, you can have a more positive or a more negative reaction.
I know which I choose every time. When it comes to other people
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt
“Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.” Said Charles R Swindoll
There is no getting away from it, we all face setbacks, mishaps, challenges and obstacles strategically placed along the road of life. How you deal with them ultimately determines the quality of your life.
This morning I had an appointment for a blood test at my local doctor’s surgery. A place, thankfully I rarely frequent. I was unsure of the procedure, was a few minutes late for my appointment and was spoken to in a very rude manner by the phlebotomist. So much so I was on the verge of tears.
Driving home I was processing the situation and came to the conclusion that it wasn't so much the sarcastic way I was spoken to - but my reaction to what she had said. I had a choice, to feel hurt and angry and let it eat me up all day or I could simply let it go.
How you react to situations is a choice that you make every single day. Next time something similar happens to you, remember you choose, you can have a more positive or a more negative reaction.
I know which I choose every time. When it comes to other people
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt
Tuesday, 1 June 2010
Is Your Door Of Opportunity Open?
Day 16 I'm Not Taking NO For A Answer
This morning my two youngest daughters aged 6 and 8 started a 3 day tennis course. I dropped them off at 9 am at the local tennis club, full of excitement and I guess some anticipation as neither daughter has played tennis before.
One hour later they came home beaming, great big smiles spreading across their little faces, ‘We love tennis, we love tennis’ they shouted in unison. What really astonished me was their openness and willingness to grasp an opportunity full on without knowing the outcome and ‘going for it’ with such gusto.
Mark Twain said “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.”
I believe opportunities are waiting around every corner. You never quite know when that door of opportunity is going to open wide. I'm also a great believer in the Law of Attraction, one of the fundamental laws of the universe, which states, we bring into our lives a reflection of what we are attracting, be it negative or positive.
My girls on average have 630,000 hours ahead of them to do with what they will, sleeping, working, playing, living, being, doing and having.
I've learned so much from observing my children. How about you will you be ready to reach out and grab opportunty when it next knocks, to throw off the bowlines, Sail away from the safe harboor, Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover?
This morning my two youngest daughters aged 6 and 8 started a 3 day tennis course. I dropped them off at 9 am at the local tennis club, full of excitement and I guess some anticipation as neither daughter has played tennis before.
One hour later they came home beaming, great big smiles spreading across their little faces, ‘We love tennis, we love tennis’ they shouted in unison. What really astonished me was their openness and willingness to grasp an opportunity full on without knowing the outcome and ‘going for it’ with such gusto.
Mark Twain said “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.”
I believe opportunities are waiting around every corner. You never quite know when that door of opportunity is going to open wide. I'm also a great believer in the Law of Attraction, one of the fundamental laws of the universe, which states, we bring into our lives a reflection of what we are attracting, be it negative or positive.
My girls on average have 630,000 hours ahead of them to do with what they will, sleeping, working, playing, living, being, doing and having.
I've learned so much from observing my children. How about you will you be ready to reach out and grab opportunty when it next knocks, to throw off the bowlines, Sail away from the safe harboor, Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover?
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