Monday, 14 September 2009

Are You A Fraud?

Mary has officially been running her beauty consultancy business for the past six months ‘….but I feel such a fraud at times – on the surface I appear to be coping well, but under the exterior I often wonder how long I can keep this front up……….everyone else seems to know exactly what they are doing.’

Mary, although an expert in the beauty industry is experiencing a fairly common feeling , when she is working directly with her clients she feels very confident but a lot of her time is spent doing unfamiliar tasks and she often feels outside her comfort zone.

I pointed out to Mary that this was a fairly common experience in the early days of trading and this kind of self talk can quickly lead us to placing self - imposed limits upon on ourselves, it can stop us dead in our tracks if we aren’t quick to identify it.

I invite you to read the article below by Personal Development coach Karen Williams who describes how you can overcome just about anything that is holding you back and shares 20 top tips that will help you celebrate the good you are doing.

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Do you ever think that "I'm no good at this" and expect to be "found out"?

Do you dismiss your accomplishments or successes as a "fluke" or that you were "in the right place at the right time"?

Do you believe that other people think you are more intelligent than you believe you actually are?

Are you waiting for people to reveal that you are a phoney or exposed as a sham?

Do you think that any success you have is due to contacts, luck, good timing, or perseverance?

If you agree with any or all of these statements; don't worry, you're not alone. Studies indicate that up to 70% of people fear that they will be labelled as a phoney. Perhaps you don't feel that you are good enough, or something has happened to you that makes you put a downer on yourself.

Whatever your achievements and how good about something you feel, do you find it difficult to celebrate your successes and go out and shout about what you have achieved or done?

In today's society we are pressurised to do more with less, have higher expectations, and fit more and more into our days. It is no wonder that we feel angst and disappointment rather than euphoria and excitement. Sometimes it can link from the messages and expectations you received as a child and even during your adult life, but often we forget to celebrate our successes.

So, how can you celebrate every small thing that you achieve and have the belief and faith in your own abilities?

1. Don't set yourself impossible standards
2. Learn from your mistakes, brush yourself down and move on
3. Reward yourself for the effort you take to get things done not just for the outcome
4. Keep a success journal outlining all of your achievements and add to it every week, no matter how small you think it is
5. Recognise the times that you doubt yourself and remind yourself that you are good enough
6. Remember that you don't have to be superwoman or superman
7. When you receive a compliment, thank the person giving it to you rather than just brushing it off
8. If you want to appear more confident than you actually are in a situation, 'act as if'. You're not being a phoney, you are promoting yourself in the way you wish to be received
9. Give yourself permission to achieve your greatest potential
10. Take a risk and learn from it - good and bad
11. Recognise your negative inner voice which may tell you that you are not good enough. Acknowledge it, then ignore it or challenge it
12. Remind yourself daily that you are good enough
13. Never undervalue yourself
14. Do one thing each day that you don't want to do to move you closer to your dreams or goals
15. Don't compare yourself with others and remember that you are a unique person
16. Trust your instincts and listen to what your heart is telling you
17. Accept that there will be days when you want to stay under your duvet
18. Do something every day that you love to do
19. Acknowledge your strengths and make them stronger
20. Do a good deed, help someone else or make someone's day

Karen Williams is a personal development coach who helps people to re-find direction in their career. If you want to achieve greater success in your career, download your free tips now at www.selfdiscoverycoaching.co.uk.Karen can also help you on your journey to career success. Register today at http://www.selfdiscoverycoaching.co.uk/onlinecareerprogramme.html.

1 comment:

Roberta Jerram said...

Great blog Allison and Karen and so mny good points... 70% eh? I had no idea!

Roberta