Are you valuing yourself highly?

Day 6/7 I'm Not Taking No for An Answer

The other day my mentor made a passing comment whist discussing our value in the market place, what we charge, our hourly or daily rates and how that equates to the value we place on ourselves.

Then last evening whilst flicking through a book on wealth creation I stumbled across a tool I’m very familiar with, a simple but highly effective tool that many of my coaching colleagues use to help people find balance in their lives, the Wheel of Life.

This got me thinking about what areas of my life I perhaps don’t place enough value on myself and I started to question why I’m not fully living my values in those areas. After all if I don’t value myself how can I expect anyone else to?

You see the level of think you currently have has got you to where you are today. I’ve done a lot of personal development over the years and I’m doing well, I’m very happy in my life but like everyone else I still have habitual thinking patterns that can hold me back. They are patterns that run unconsciously in our minds. So to grow, or make changes, you need to regularly evaluate where you are and challenge your current level of thinking. It’s one of the contributing factors to being successful.

I know what areas I need to work on, how about you? Where could you be making improvements, what thoughts do you have that are holding you back? What’s that internal voice saying to you?

By the way, if you want to get paid more, you have to work harder – on yourself.

There Has To Be Another Way

It’s only natural in the early days of setting up and running your own business that you may feel that there is far too much to do and not enough time to do it all.

Four years on and I still find the demands on my time and energy to be overwhelming at times despite a fair amount of outsourcing that goes to my wonderful VA, Tracy.

But there are only 24 hours in a day and there is only one of me!

Something I accepted about myself today was that I actually put a lot of pressure upon myself unnecessarily. I have a tendency to try and do too much and please everyone bar myself.

So enough is enough, it’s time to up the ante and rise to a higher level. ‘There has to be another way’ as Jason Vale ‘The Juice Master’ would say.

After all top earners outsource just about everything they possibly can in order to focus 100% on the things that they excel at.

If you aren’t familiar with the 80/20 rule or The Pareto’s Principle as its otherwise known then it’s a general rule that states 20% of your effort will produce 80% of your results.

Therefore I’ve been mulling over which of the daily business tasks and activities will either generate the most revenue or tasks that only I can do – the 20%. The rest can be eliminated, outsourced or automated.

If it works for Warren Buffett, the richest man in the world then I’m not opposed to taking a leaf out of his book.

How Often Do You Upset The Apple Cart?

Day 4 Not Taking No For An Answer Challenge

Have you ever attended a meeting with the full intention of sharing your views only to leave an hour or so later, kicking yourself for not speaking up?

Mmm, I can recall many a meeting in my previous career where I felt my opinions would be of little interest or of value. I would choose to remain quiet or neutral in debates for fear of upsetting the apple cart because of my desire to be liked.
A desire we all have, we all want others to think highly of us. We all want to feel important. I laugh when I look back now, but there are still occasions when I could easily slip back into those old behaviours.

Take today for example, a meeting with the other Hampshire Winning Women Business Award judges to finalise the arrangements for the award ceremony on June 24th. We’re a great team (of course,I handpicked them) and even when there was a difference of opinion I stuck by my guns. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t being stubborn or selfish,
I listened carefully, view the situation from all points of view and we reached a flexible compromise based on what was fair and acceptable to us all. We have a positive way forward and no one thinks any the less of me.

What I’ve learned along the way is that we are liked because others appreciate what we bring to their lives, what we do, how we act and if we allow fear to get in the way and fail to speak up and voice our opinions then we will never let anyone see who we really are. And if they cannot see us as our true selves then they will never get to know us or like us.

By the way, the buffet for the ceremony sounds delicious, the awards look fabulous and we now have some super sponsors. Nominations are open until June 3rd make your nomination here

What Do You Have To Lose? - Facing Your Fears.

Surrounding yourself with positive people and connecting with other likeminded women is vital for the survival of your business.

I don’t know about you but have you ever found spending time with so called ‘friends’ leaves you drained of energy and feeling lethargic? I know I have.

Nowadays those ‘friends’ receive less and less of my time. I’m far busier of course, but alongside that busyness a conscious decision was made to move away from these ‘friends’ and spend more time with people who inspire me, energise me, make me laugh , people who are dynamic, vibrant and just great company.

Just this morning as I walked the dog along the seafront I met one such wonderful woman. Let’s call her Chris, after all that’s her name. We’d only chatted for a short time but I already knew we are going to be great friends and I’m looking forward to meeting up with her again.

Another such person is Shuri, one of my coaches who’s working with me on developing my presentation skills. I have a deep rooted fear of public speaking but I also know that when I overcome this my life and business will be far greater. Even though I was challenged today to step out of my comfort zone and it felt uncomfortable at times I have immense determination to face this head on. This is one area of my life where I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer.

As Les Brown says,“When you face your fear, most of the time you will discover that it was not really such a big threat after all. We all need some form of deeply rooted, powerful motivation / it empowers us to overcome obstacles so we can live our dreams.”

What are you resolving to face up to today?


As a final note, the childcare problem is resolved and I’ve even found a wonderful person to walk the dog – Warwick here I come. Although I haven’t relished the idea of asking for support I have been pleasantly surprised by the willingness of others to help. Saying that I’m not keen to make a habit of it!
How grateful I am to have so many wonderful people in my life.

Are You An Amateur Or Professional

The difference that really makes the difference between those women who run their businesses successfully and those who have intermittent success is their business mindset.

It’s their attitude or approach to running their business that is significantly different. Let me explain.

It must be about four years ago when my then mentor described the difference between those who ‘play at having a business’ and those who go out there and really make it happen. It was the bit about those who ‘play’ at business that struck a chord. Ouch I resonated with that!
I wasn’t taking things as seriously as I could have. I was terribly naïve and had foolishly hoped that by coaching a few friends, they would refer me and the business would take off, I’d do a little bit of advertising (in all the wrong places I might add) and that would be sufficient. So when my mentor talked about investing time, effort and money right from the start I knew I had to go back to basics, review my plans, rewrite my goals and start afresh like a ‘professional’ rather than the amateur I had been.

In this context I'm referring to an amateur as someone who probably wakes up in the morning and thinks ‘Oh I’m not feeling particularly motivated, it’s a warm sunny day. I don’t think I’ll make those follow up calls today, I’ll do them tomorrow instead.’
A professional on the other hand will do the things they need to do whether they feel like it or not. A professional will adopt an attitude that says ‘I’m going to do one thing, one task or activity every single day to grow my business.’

Bear in mind that if that is the case, then over the course of one year, 365 days, just imagine what a difference one small tiny step would impact on your business development.
If your mindset isn’t right then you are only going to achieve limited success. It’s so vital to get your mindset, your attitude right.

So, why then knowing this, did I wake up this morning thinking like an amateur?

Maybe because the childcare issue from yesterday was still not resolved and I’d subconsciously attached those feelings to the day ahead? Possibly, here’s the thing, having a heightened awareness of my thoughts I was quickly able to change them. As soon as I noticed this thought pattern I turned my focus towards all the exciting things that were planned to happen today and happen they did.

Firstly, two friends are happy to look after the girls for me on Friday afternoon. Asking wasn’t as difficult as I’d imagined, it was all in my mind. Secondly, today was one of my monthly optional ‘call in days’ for my VIP and Make it Happen clients to pick up the phone and ask questions, sound out ideas, have laser coaching etc. Wow, 12 calls and what wonderful achievements and breakthroughs taking place. Well done to all of you, you certainly aren’t taking ‘No’ for an answer.

Will you be brave enough to join me and take the challenge?

Yesterday I was set a challenge by my coach and business mentor. The context of which, was set around ‘sales’. Good timing - as one of the most challenging aspects for me running my business is closing a sale. Sound familiar? Mmm thought so.

Anyway, our challenge was to face our fear and not take no for an answer. I pondered this on the way home and decided to widen the remit, after all if I am going to face up to something that challenges me , then what other fears do I need to break through? What other areas of my life and/or my business could I apply the ‘I’m not taking no for an answer’ mantra to? I realised there were quite a few.

So just for fun I’ve decided to make ‘I’m not taking No for an answer’ my focus for the next 30 days. I’ll be diarising my thoughts, fears, challenges and successes in my blog and I’d like to invite you to join me.

Why? Because when you become aware, truly aware of your patterns of behaviour you can change them. If you are letting those patterns of behaviour hold you back and allowing them to run your life instead of you running it, then you aint gonna get very far. They say it takes 30 days to create a new habit or pattern and I believe that life changes when you change.

So if you want more clients, more me time, more fun, more sales, more productivity, more leisure time, more anything then let’s face the fears head on and do it together. Let’s make it happen.

Day 1

1. Why can’t I upload this photograph to my laptop?

So here’s my first challenge. I’ve done it before so in my book that means I can do it again. There’s a positive! But I feel myself getting increasingly frustrated as time ticks away. “I should be working, this isn’t being very productive” I keep telling myself. So why do I persist? Because I know that by shouting out my plan to the world (uploading the photograph relevant to this post) I’m more likely to take the necessary actions to achieve it. Just by telling people alone will motivate me into taking action. So I persist. “Give up this is too hard” I hear again, but then I hit the right button and hey presto! Persistence paid off. Photo uploaded. I didn’t take no for an answer.

2. My childcare arrangements for Friday have just fallen through.

For those of you who don’t yet know, my hubby is away and the consistent, trustworthy support I’d previously relied upon is no more. I’m supposed to be spending the day thrashing out ideas with my coach and business mentor. This opportunity only comes up once in every two months and I really want to go. But who wants to look after three extra children on a Friday afternoon? Perhaps I won’t go. It would be much easier to stay at home. I can’t do the full day as it is, because I’d need to drop the girls at school first before driving 3 hours, I’d only be able to stay for a maximum two hours before jumping in the car again and driving the 3 hours home again. But it is worth it. I get so much out of these meetings.

There has got to be a way. Don’t take no for an answer, who can I ask to have the girls for a couple of hours? Who? Ah I know. I have a couple of ideas, will make a call and see if they would mind. I’m not taking no for an answer.

Will keep you posted on the outcome of this one!

So are you brave enough to accept the challenge? Or are you going to look back regretfuly when you see your friends and colleagues around you leaping forward, taking big strides as they break through the fears and challenges that once held them back?

How To Customize Your Facebook Fan Page URL

Whether for business or personal use there's no doubt about it Social Media is big news and its here to stay for the foreseeable future.

Email is no longer the most obvious way of communicating - facebook is. How often do you write on friends/fans walls whe you want to send a note or message?

So what happens when you want to share your link? Facebook links tend to be long, particualrly if you have a fan page, or official page as they are now called.

I stumbled across this You Tube video, that shows you how to create a shorter and more memorable facebook url.